Martha plus Judas does not equal Mary

Last night one of our lovely young deacons greeted me by saying that he knew with certainty that God was very, very pleased with me.

That was his greeting. The first words he spoke to me.

He is a gentle, sweet spirit, and was undoubtedly encouraging my propensity toward operating ala Martha. And it did encourage me.

But it also convicted me.

It's bad enough that I congratulate myself for my Martha busyness, neglecting to be Mary in the process. But in prayer this morning I realized something even worse; I also use my Martha to justify my Judas. As if the good works that I do somehow counterbalance the evil that I do.

But it doesn't work that way.

My works are good, and He is pleased by them. As this morning's 1 Samuel passage read, He remembers the prayers prayed and the alms offered. But they can't compare in weight to the sin. It's not a balancing act. The loving touches that a wife abuser offers do not lesson the damage and shame of the punches. Just the opposite; they become a mockery of what should be beautiful.

So this morning was a time of gentle chiding. He is so very gentle with me.

He wants more of my attention. More of the attention I direct toward objects which are indeed lovely, but less lovely than He.

I am encouraged by the quote I posted earlier today; I work toward obedience through the gift of faith God has granted me, and I hope for the bloom of patience upon it.

Obedience is the fruit of faith

Obedience is the fruit of faith; patience, the bloom on the fruit.

--Rossetti

(This was good for me to hear today.)

From The Baptism of Imagination: A conversation with Peter Kreeft:

"Faith and hope and love all have a moreness to them. Faith means I trust you more than I can prove, hope means I hope for more than I can attain and grasp, and love means there is more in you than I can possibly love worthily."